It is an error for you to tell your wife, daughter or son things like ?Don?t do something evil or bad so that you don?t soil my name and spoil my political ambition.?
This is a statement from a selfish and self centred man. If I rephrase the statement, it means ?Look! You are not important and you don?t matter. I don?t care what happens to you. All I care about is my political ambition. If not for my personal desires, I won?t even ask after your welfare.?
You must realize that your wife and children are human beings with feelings, brains and ambitions too. The likely unexpressed reaction to your statement will be ?Look at this man. So, it is all about your name, political ambition and business. Foolish man! I will just do what I want. You are on your own. Who cares about your useless name and ambition?
The counsel that could give you positive result is: ?My dear (wife, son or daughter), this way you are following is against the will of God and word of God for you. It can lead you to destruction and affect your future negatively. I love you and I don?t want evil things to happen to you. Moreso, God and the government or the law will not be happy with you. You could attract a curse, punishment or destruction to yourself and obstruct your destiny.?
It is about God and the person being addressed. You are a counsellor, guardian, caretaker to the home. Your role as the head of the home should be played in love, on behalf of God, FOR THE GLORY OF GOD (Not your personal glory).
Don?t refer to your child as ?my son? or ?my daughter? when you are talking to your spouse. It is a display of selfishness (when the child is doing well). It becomes ?your son? or ?your daughter? when the child is doing badly (a display of cowardice and irresponsibility).
When your son or daughter introduces a potential life partner to you, your endorsement should not be based on considerations of political or financial status of potential in-laws. In fact, leave your children to decide the kind of husband or wife they desire. Your intervention should only have to do with questions as regards character of the potential son or daughter in-law. Even your daughter or son will be able to do this screening if your home has been built around God, godly lifestyle and values. Teach them the ways of God from the beginning.
MEMORY VERSE:?These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates (Deuteronomy 6:6-9 NIV)
PRAYER POINT:?Oh Lord! I hand my wife and children over to you. Set their hearts on fire with desire for righteousness in Jesus name. Amen.
…TO BE CONTINUED (Questions Are Welcome)
For feedback, contact
Deacon ALBINUS CHIEDU
Coordinator, MARRIAGE CAN WORK MINISTRY
P. O. Box, 13188, Ikeja, Lagos, Nigeria