When Grief Drives Us To Human Touch


In the movie not easily broken, Dave Johnson (Morris Chestnut) taught the kids in his baseball team to understand two of life?s most important realities-Race and human kind.

The first and which concerned racism sought to build in these kids a mind of just and a race of humanity and that is the human race. The second and which was to shape their perspective on human kind taught them two kinds of people the world over-and that is the good ones and the bad ones-not the black and white they were growing up with.

These were great lessons for children coming from racially abusive and segregated backgrounds; and were growing with their own perspective of the human race, which obviously they were picking from the streets, as they were predominately children of offenders.

And in as much as these lessons were to go down well with these kids, give them a new life and build a winning team-perhaps one ??with hall-of-fame numbers??, coach as the kids called him had his own mystery to unravel. He always wondered ??why bad things always happen to good people???

I guess anyone in Dave character would have wondered in like manner, for he was a good man and a husband to one. Unlike his colleague coaches, he never browsed nor bought. Just as he mentioned, he always kept his eyes straight ahead. Indeed his friend even attested to his character and described him as ?radar? to Clarice his wife. Yet Dave always came home to pain and misunderstanding. Ones that made him grieve and crave for human touch. I even wondered whether it is true as they say that ??it’s hard to keep the good in a good marriage??.

For years humanity deceived the world into believing that people of some colour and tribe are superior if not more, to others. Consequently, human behavior in these periods responded to such conviction. To the extent that racial killings, abuse, human sufferings, denial of right, wars, repressive regimes, and slavery have been adopted to affirm, proclaim and enforce such barbaric thinking. The consequences are well evidenced in the increasing bitterness, retaliations among men and women of descending generations.

Thirteen years into the 21st century, racism, is one big challenge that even the world football association with its ?decorated interventions? is struggling to live without.

While it may be understandable for blacks and whites to claim racial supremacy and begrudge each other as a result, what justification do we then make when people not only of the same color but lineage, thinking, and relations deny themselves of their in-built humanly touch and cause themselves much bitterness and sorrows?

Love was meant to be understood, experienced and acted upon; particularly in marriage and family. Yet generations after generation have failed to restore the world to order with the love they were born with.

Today the subject continues to remain a great mystery to human understanding. What is most surprising, many homes are deprived of such divine gesture and its inhabitants are always in constant such of love outside. Even the very homes built on the altar of love are now struggling to cope with each other.

This has not only led to the destruction of homes but pushed many into acts that have gone to betray their faith and consciousness.

Just as in the movie, Dave developed friendship with his wife?s physical therapist Julie- Maeve Quinlan. This friendship ultimately led to comfort when Julie’s son, Bryson (Cannon Jay) died unexpectedly in swimming accident. It finally ensued that Dave kissed Julie and nearly ended in sexual affair in one night of such comfort, which was driven by Julie?s grieve over her lost son and Dave?s distant relationship with his wife. But as good as he was in character Dave realised he is not meant to break the cord irrespective of the pains his marriage has brought on him.

In a letter to my soon-to-be colleague husbands, I charged them not to drive their wives emotionally unstable for work, as that might lead to their emotions being preyed on by evil men. In actual sense it was not only meant for husbands, it was to offer lessons to us all including wives of husbands. And so in concluding, I charge all homes not-be devoid of love for grief can drive people to human touch. Tolerate each other. Be compassionate to forgive. Build broken bridges and forge a common thinking ahead, for just as the good book says, ??no temptation has overtaken you except as common to man??.

Source:?Bernard Kwofie

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