Ezinne Akudo Anyaoha

A Peep Into My Heart

My daily activities have so far remained mainly courtesy visits, interviews, meetings and preparations towards the Launch of my pet project.

The third week in office was particularly interesting I visited the Deputy Speaker of the House of Representatives, Hon. Emeka Nkem Ihedioha to talk with him about the controversial issue of child marriage in Nigeria and let him know exactly how ‘we’ feel about the issue.

The meeting was really cool and friendly….I learnt a lot just by spending the whole day in his office. I watched the way the staff interacted with each other and the visitors that came to the office. I got a whole new orientation on how people related in an office environment. I also got to know a lot more that will help shape my dealings with people.

As soon as I got back from the House of Representatives to my hotel room, my phone rang and the next thing I heard was that a friend of mine who was involved in a fatal accident two days back had ?given up the ghost?.

I was thrown into mourning. The news sent me into a state of sober reflection. I began to look at life from a different perspective. Life is transient. I reflected on my whole life all over again. I began to look at friendships more closely than I have ever done.

I now completely agree that we only appreciate things we have when we lose them. We believe people will always be around us and for that we take advantage of them and forget to give them the attention they need and deserve.

Last year, my friend complained to my pastor, saying that I don?t make it easy for anyone and I frustrated all his efforts to be nice to me. It only touched me for a few seconds to be honest and then my life went on. We graduated from school shortly after that and everyone moved on to different things.

Last month, he sent me a message on bbm to say he was happy that I won the Miss Nigeria 2013 pageant and also asked me how life was for me as a beauty queen. I was happy we were talking after such a long time, even though I can?t remember asking him how he had been and what he was up to. This was two days before he died. It was weird for me!

 As you go through life, you will meet people and make friends. Some of them will make great efforts to be part of your life and sometimes, it will be the other way round. It is a process and sometimes it seems like a game. But well friends we need them whichever way you look at it from.
We must keep pushing and keep trying to put smiles in the faces of everyone that comes into our lives. We need to pay a little more attention to people in our lives. Zaynab Akali in her book ?Stillborn? said: ?kolanuts last longer in the mouth of those that value them.? We should never forget this.

I have had my own fair share of drama and disappointments but at this point disappointments from a friend should not be an excuse for not giving back or giving your best in a relationship.

I had friends I didn’t think there was any need to be very close to, friends I didn’t have to check on everyday, friends I only saw when something brought us together like church, school, or events. I have also had friends that irritated me constantly by checking on me everyday just so they know how things were going for me and they sincerely cared. I really didn’t think I had to reciprocate or show any form of interest and I didn’t bother with anyone’s personal details, I was like that. I got too comfortable with my personal space due to certain factors and I locked up, getting close to me was a big deal and also a lot of work, it was like that. But all that has changed now. I am determined to pay attention to details and show a little more care.

You don?t have to wait to lose someone to realise that anytime you are speaking to a person could be the last time. Be nice to people. Learn how to get personal with others, find out something about the person next to you that no one else knows, get to know their story and you will be surprised. Every minute counts. Make the best of it.

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