We all grew up thinking that lies must be told right? The childhood rhyme …Johnny Johnny eating sugar …taught me that. There are however untold truths or hidden facts that are in actual fact lies.
One of the most difficult things to do, is to keep a secret. In fact I do not know which is easier, keeping a good secret or a bad secret.
When it is a good secret, you smile to yourself a lot and just look happy going about. You hum songs as you think about your precious little secret, letting out a giggle here and there. And when it will be revealed, like a surprise, it’s even better! You lie boldly and make all the necessary interventions to ensure your cover is not blown. You talk a lot more than usual.
A not so good secret on the other hand is not quite the same. You wear a stone face and hope it can ward off unnecessary prying. You avoid niceties and try to talk less. You become suspicious and say all the wrong things. You have an invisible load hanging on your back and you forget no one else can see it. Everything offends you.
Being able to share with someone is always so relieving. You sleep better and wake even better. The worst prison to live in, is inside your head with such undisclosed details. You will be able to know your true friends based on what they know about you.
I always encourage openness in a marriage because many do not consider it. You have to be conscious about being open to your partner. They have your best interest at heart and will counsel you without reservations and biases.
It is vey easy to have subject based friends like kokonsa partners, construction friends, church friends, investment friends, politics, football, makeup, childcare and education friends etc..But your central point must be your own partner because you are building a life together and communication must be fluid.
There are spouses that say they have nothing to talk about, but once they move to the street and meet someone else, they can easily start a conversation.
Openness is a sign of an honest strong bond. It will boost confidence in each other and influence those around you positively even your children. The communication circle is never complete without openness.